Successfully Navigating Midlife Requires Letting Go

How do you handle change?

I don’t always handle it well. As much as I value personal growth, I find myself holding back at times, afraid to let go of things in my life that are obviously no longer working.

In a recent article about fears of loss and change in midlife, Douglas LaBier suggests that even when we want things to get “better,” we tend to cling to the past rather than move forward. This is something we all face at one time or another.

LaBier’s advice for successfully navigating midlife involves: (1) reframing your feelings about change, and (2) creating new possibilities in your life by taking conscious actions that will reenergize you and keep you engaged.

Reframe the negative feelings you have about loss and change

Changing your perspective about change and loss means accepting uncertainty and the unknown. That’s not easy for most of us.

But staying attached to what is in the past will keep you from engaging life in the present, where it’s meant to be lived. As long as you’re holding on to past events, relationships, or your feelings of resentment or anger about those things, you’re not moving forward. You’re not moving at all.

Loss is what drives us to grow. It’s what leads us to new opportunities.

So stop letting what’s happened in the past hold you back. When you’re faced with things like changes at work, health issues, or financial concerns, accept that these things are happening and then reframe them. Acknowledge that things have not turned out as you had hoped, and that it’s now time to look for new, more effective solutions.

Take conscious actions to create new possibilities

According to LaBier, successfully navigating midlife involves taking conscious action to create positive change in your life, which will in turn positively impact the lives of those around you.

An effective way to do that is to direct your energies toward something larger than yourself.

When you become engaged in a larger purpose or “cause,” your focus shifts away from yourself to what’s truly meaningful – the people you wish to serve or the legacy you want to leave. This larger purpose is the thing that pulls you to use your unique talents and strengths.

As you identify the steps you need to take and begin taking action, you not only open up your life to new possibilities, you turn your work into a calling.

There is something you’re uniquely designed to do. Will you let go of the past so you can make it happen?

Photo credit: FreeWine / CC license

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